Injunctional Bias: Like Sanusi, Like Diezani?

 

With conflicting media reports, it is unclear whether or not the minister of petroleum resources, Diezani Allison-Madueke actually did it. However, there was news of her obtaining an injunction against the federal house of representatives, restraining them from investigating allegations that she spends considerable sums of state funds maintaining private jets for her personal use.

 

Now, mainstream social media (perhaps mainstream Nigeria, even) has a slight but very palpable anti-federal government bias. This may or may not be justified, but that is hardly the point. So, news of her having obtained this injunction has been greeted with derision at Diezani and frustration at the Nigerian judiciary. Watchers on the pro-government side of things have however pointed out what they perceive to be inconsistent criticism, as ousted/suspended/retired governor of the Central Bank, Mallam Lamido Sanusi, was congratulated when he obtained a similar injunction a few weeks ago. Are the Sanusi and Allison-Madueke injunctions one and the same? I do not think so. Why?

 

Well, according to information on its own website, the FRC “is a federal government agency established by the Financial Reporting Council of Nigeria Act, No. 6, 2011.  It is a federal government Parastatal under the supervision of the Federal Ministry of Industry, Trade and Investment. The FRC is responsible for, among other things, developing and publishing accounting and financial reporting standards to be observed in the preparation of financial statements of public entities in Nigeria; and for related matters.” The enabling Act also suggests that the FRC is strictly concerned with developing, setting and enforcing accounting financial reporting standards.

Does the FRC have the power to investigate for financial misappropriation? [CORRECTION] Hmmm. The enabling Act entitles the FRC to investigate “any complaint or dishonest practice, negligence, professional misconduct or malpractice, made against any professional.” The FRC also has the power to summon the professional being investigated. Who then is a “professional” for the purposes of the FRC Act? The Act seems to use “professional” interchangeably with “professional accountant” (see the sections on registration), so I would suggest that the FRC’s power to investigate is limited to professional accountants who have not conducted themselves properly in their audit/financial reporting. I do not think its powers of investigation of the FRC, as drafted, extend to investigating financial misappropriation. In any event, the courts will rule on whether the CBN governor’s suit against the FRC on the 12th of May.

 

So, in my opinion, Sanusi’s injunction was ostensibly to stop a federal agency from arrogating questionable powers to itself or overreaching itself. At the very least, the FRC’s power to investigate a CBN governor is questionable. Agreed?

 

On the other hand, the constitution establishes, unequivocally, that Houses of Assembly have the power to investigate (a) any matter over which it has power to make laws; (b) the conduct of affairs of any person or agency charged with administering its laws or disbursing money it has appropriated.

 

But the constitution does not stop there. It goes on to say that the foregoing powers are only exercisable for the purpose of enabling the National Assembly to (a) make or amend laws; and “(b) expose corruption, inefficiency or waste in the execution or administration of laws within its legislative competence and in the disbursement or administration of funds appropriated by it.”

 

Dear friends, does the National Assembly have the power to investigate allegations of corruption or misappropriation of funds against a minister of a federal government ministry in respect of which the Assembly makes laws and appropriates funds? I think so.

Is there any basis for courts to grant an injunction to restrain the National Assembly from investigating a minister? Oh yes! If their investigation is neither for the purpose of aiding the legislative process nor for exposing corruption, etc., then yes, the National Assembly would be acting outside its constitutional bounds.

 

Is this investigation concerned with exposing corruption and waste? The answer, my friends, is blowing in the wind…

 

 

Limericks – Updates

President Robert Mugabe of Zimbabwe turned 90 on the 21st of February. In the run-up to the big day, the ice-creaming loving liberator informed the world that he had no plans to retire. He will live forever, this man.

 

To Robert, now nonagenarian

That plucky life-presidentarian

Who plans to sit tight

In official might

We extend a felicitation

 

Old Robert of modern Rhodesia

By now should be wracked with amnesia

Instead his design

Is not to resign

We might have to try euthanasia

 

————————————————

The huge swing in the limericks of Lamido is quite jarring. In the space of only a few weeks, we went from chronicling his “disagreements” with the NNPC to being shocked at and debating the legality of his suspension by the President. Not only did the President appoint an acting Governor, a substantive replacement was also named on the same day. Badass, mister president!

 

There once was a head central banker

Whose disgust could not be made franker

His figures of oil

Made us all recoil

NNPC think he’s a w**ker

 

S.Lam of the squeezy transmission

Found bulky misappropriation

But Minister Dez

(From all that she sez)

Believes it’s misrepresentation.

 

Godwin’s come into some good luck

Hope he won’t be mere sitting duck

He’s taken the place

Of ex-squeezing ace

Who frankly does not give a f-

 

A farewell to precious ol’ Lam

For daring to finger ‘la DAM’

His cart was upended

For he was suspended

Thus clearing the tetchy logjam

 

—————————————-

The personal assistant to the son of the governor of Abia State died at the gun of his boss’s police orderly. It is being reported that the First Son gave the kill order. Naturally, however, the Police authorities are saying one of their guns was naughty again and accidentally discharged. They need to be castrated, these easily excitable guns.

 

This tragic PA situation

Has roundly met our condemnation

But powers that be

Explain, ’twas you see

Unintended ejaculation

 

There once was a First Son’s P.A.

They say he was shot dead today

They say at his word

A gunshot was heard

The orderly earning his pay

 

—————————————

In Sports, Jose called Arsene a “specialist in failure”, the NFF finds itself in the peculiar position of advocating for a foreign assistant to their winningest coach in decades, Fulham sacked Rene Meulensteen, David Moyes, continues to break records, having his team set one for the most crosses in a premier league match – 81.

 

There once was mouthy mentalist

Called Arsene a failure specialist

That haughty retort

Is sorely abhorred

By every football tribalist

 

You must not ‘ave ‘eard zem, Renee

Zat’s why zey ‘ave sacked you today

Said it only once

But your Resistance

Did not raise zeir standard of play

 

Since Alex chose David on bias

Each challenge’s been the Himalayas

Each foe David’s seen

Has busted his spleen

Has been the proverbial Goliath

 

The tactic today is to cross

Tis what they’ve been told by the boss

They haven’t yet scored

Their fans’ ox is gored

Let’s hope won’t be another loss.

 

A farewell by ManU to Vidic

Ain’t Popeye, no rescue from spinach

He used to be great

Been dodgy of late

And now he is off to play Quidditch!

 

In spite of their worst machination

Keshi has been a revelation

Yet powers that be

Inexplicably

Insist on foreign “assistation”.

 

———————————————

The Villa did a fair amount of personnel shuffling since our last update. After its stoic silence on the numerous allegations against erstwhile Minister of Aviation, Stella Oduah, the Presidency did a Jack Reacher and got rid of 5 ministers, including Ms Oduah. Just before she was relieved of her office though, it was rumoured, then quickly denied that she’d ordered the State Secret Service to keep its staff away from her international airports.

 

The needful now done somewhat late

Will agencies investigate

Or will this her boot

Be mere parachute

No info, so we speculate

 

L.Maku says they were not sacked

That in fact, the President’s backed

Their wish to engage

Political stage

And give their home states what they’ve lacked

 

Ah Stella, the Actress of God

From Ministrial BeeM-ers now shod

A tardy farewell

Though we know too well

Not really, for she’s Johnnie’s blood

 

Ms Stella’s again in the news

Bizarre, but they say she’s refused

To permit access

By the SSS

To airports, and they’ve blown a fuse

 

——————————————-

Mallam Nasir El-Rufai was arrested by the SSS and asked to clarify his “there will be blood” remarks about next year’s elections. Vigilant social commentators quickly pointed out that some persons of the same ethnic group as the President had made similar remarks and had been rewarded by the State with a Presidential commando rescue from Benin Republic. They say the government does not give a damn about social media but Mujahid Asari Dokubo, would-be liberator of the Niger-Delta, was arrested shortly afterwards.

 

To balance the Mallam equation

DSS, in rectification

Has deigned to invite

Professor Ignite

The Lord of All Emancipation

 

———————————————–

It emerged that some monarch in Nnewi, in a fit of ironic buffoonery, given that his first name is Wisdom, issued the most misogynistic of fatwahs.

 

Nnewi’s again in the news

King Wisdom in foolish abuse

Decrees & requires

That women’s attires

Be skirts scarfs or else be taboos

 

———————————————

It’s a failing he admitted to in his autobiography but we believed him to have come fully clean in My Story. Well, a previously obscure (in the international sense) daily paper in Ireland broke the story of a purported affair between President Bill Clinton and Elizabeth Hurley, while he was president. The source of the story, Ms Hurley’s boyfriend at the time, now admits he made it all up. Between story breaking and denial being published, however, we did the limerick below.

 

In Blighty, a rumour’s emerged

About ol’Bill’s legendary urge

Tripp, Winsky, now Hurley

Yes, human, but surely

His rep must be nigh on its verge

 

—————————————-

Governor Aregbesola of Osun state is a peculiar one. After merging state schools in a curious turn of educational policy, pupils arrived wearing the garb of their religions – Christians in choir robes, Muslims in veils and burkahs, and traditionalists bearing charms and armulets.

 

In Osun right now there’s confusion

In secondary school institution

Rauf did a mix

And now he must fix

The Mus-Christ-Trado revolution

 

————————————

Say a prayer for Borno.

 

Maiduguri skies growing darker

As one rampage follows another

The soil’s all soaked

Our throats are all choked

By this tragic ‪#BornoMassacre

 

Sanusi’s Suspension: Right or Wrong?

Better Days... (L-R): Ngozi Okonjo-Iweala, Sanusi Lamido Sanusi, Goodluck Jonathan

Better Days…

Today, the 20th of February 2014, the President’s Spokesperson, Dr Reuben Abati, announced that President Jonathan had suspended Sanusi Lamido Sanusi, Governor of the Central Bank of Nigeria, and had appointed an Acting Governor in his place. Sanusi’s first tenure of 5 years ought to have ended in a few months’ time and he was widely reported not to be interested in a second term, to which he would ordinarily have been entitled.

The announcement of his suspension follows recent reports of turbulence between the erstwhile CBN over several issues, including, allegedly, Sanusi’s insistence on the existence of a huge financial remittance deficit by the Nigerian National Petroleum Corporation.

Does the President have the power to suspend or otherwise remove the Governor from office? Well, sorta, kinda. Section 11 of the CBN Act of 2007 states as follows –

11(1) A person shall not remain a Governor, Deputy Governor or Director of the [Central] Bank [of Nigeria] if he is –

(a) a member of any Federal or State legislative house; or

(b) a Director, officer or employee of any bank licensed under the Banks and Other Financial Institutions Act.

11(2) The Governor, Deputy Governor or Director shall cease to hold office in the Bank if he –

(a) becomes of unsound mind, or owing to ill health, is incapable of carrying out his duties;

(b) is convicted of any criminal offence by a court of competent jurisdiction except for traffic offences or contempt proceedings arising in connection with the execution or intended execution of any power or duty conferred under this Act or the Banks and Other Financial Institutions Act;

(c)  is guilty of a serious misconduct in relation  to his duties under this Act;

(d) is disqualified or suspended from practising his profession in Nigeria by order of a competent authority made in respect of him personally;

(e) becomes bankrupt;

(f)                is removed by the President:

Provided that the removal of the Governor shall be supported by two-thirds majority of the Senate praying that he be so removed.

(3) The Governor or any Deputy Governor may resign his office by giving at least three months’ notice in writing to the President of his intention to do so and any Director may similarly resign by givingat least one month’s notice in writing to the President of his intention to do so.

(4) If the Governor, any Deputy Governor of Director of the Bank dies, resigns or otherwise vacates his office before the expiry of the tem for which he has been appointed, there shall be appointed a fit and proper person to take his place on the Board for the unexpired period of the term of appointment in the first instance if the vacancy is that of –

(a) the Governor or a Deputy Governor, the appointment shall be made in the manner prescribed by section 8(1) and (2) of this Act; and

(b) any Director, the appointment shall be made in the manner prescribed by section 10(1) and (2) of this Act.

If we look at 11(2)(f), which was highlighted, I believe we can conclude that the President has taken a legitimate first step in removing Sanusi from the position of Governor. However, the removal is what we lawyers like to describe as “inchoate” until it is ratified by a two-thirds majority of the Senate. Can Senate President, David Mark, deliver a two-thirds majority to the President, to rubber-stamp Sanusi’s removal? One is confused with all the defections and cross-defections in the National Assembly of late, but we will just have to wait and see.

Limericks and Politics

It’s probably not intentional, but the limericks have veered, in a most determined fashion, into the theatre of politics since the turn  of the year. Perhaps it’s the season the country is in, with all the political intrigue already “heating up the polity”. For those who follow the politics, here’s my take on the events. For those who don’t, maybe this will spark your interest, as the question of who our leaders should be has never been more important.

1. General Muhammadu Buhari reportedly said here that the All Progressives Congress would groom tomorrow’s leaders. Pretty rich, coming from him, as he’s turned 70 and seems to wish to contest in 2015’s presidential elections  in spite of the fact that he’s participated and lost in every election since 1999.

A frequent Prez Contestant

Thrice lost,but unrepentant

Announced that his party

Will groom leaders, lawdy

He’s not even groomed a lieutenant

2.  The  YouTube video above went viral. It showed a Kenyan lady remarking tongue-in-cheek about how dazzled they were when President Jonathan came to Kenya with Nigerian businessmen, in a “convoy” of 7 private jets. It was a non-story, a chuckle and a half, until Dr. Reuben Abati (Special Assistant to the President on Media/Communications) tweeted this:

And this…

There once was a journo named Reuben

Committed to Naija improving

Now works to de-slander

Design propaganda

A pity I can’t say he’s winning.

 

There once was a journo named Reuben

Attacked the govt by lampooning

These days it’s his job

To earn a few bob

By angry retort & disproving

 

In Kenya’bout Jon it was said

To Nairobi 7 aircraft he led

It’s blown Reuben’s fuse

Challenging the news

On TABLOIDS where it’s being read.

 

So “seven” is said to be lucky

But it’s made our poor Reuben plucky

He’s pissed at the lie

“Shut Up”, “Go and Die”

Or chillax & have a kentucky

 

3. The hawks continue to circle Princess Stella Oduah, the Nigerian Minister of Aviation. First it was the scandal of the purchase of 2 armoured BMWs for $1.6m. Now, it has been alleged that she hasn’t been totally honest about her graduate studies. Shortly after the story broke, it was reported further that her aides had frantically cleaned up all her online profiles (LinkedIn, Facebook, Wikipedia and the Aviation Ministry’s website), removing all references to the questioned MBA and PhD. No statement on this yet from the presidency. Meanwhile, it was also reported that the President had, in anger, asked the outgoing CBN governor (tenure expires in June) to resign (story here) – for publicly alleging that over $40bn (!!!) of oil revenue was unaccounted for, when the true figure was closer to only $10bn.

For Princess,a new revelation

Times Premium in investigation

Is casting a doubt

(Abeg I can’t shout)

On Stella Oduah’s education

 

In spite of the Grand Renovation

It’s tricky,this school situation

Should all that she’s built

Absolve her of guilt

If she fibbed’bout her education?

 

The prez wants SLS to go

For leakage to ex-presido

And 10 lost, not 40

That letter was naughty

But Sanusi, boldly, says NO.

 

So Goody would have Lami go

For daring to spotlight the dough

But on his princess

He will not address

The beamers and CV, no, no.

 

4. Britain and Nigeria signed an agreement to deport each other’s convicted nationals to serve out their sentences in their home countries. The conspiracy theory mill swung into overdrive, anticipating that James Ibori, convicted former governor, would be one of the beneficiaries, and that he would receive a state pardon very quickly thereafter, making him eligible to actively participate in politics again.

The Crown and the Giant of Dreams

(Cos Scrubs were a-burst at the seams)

Today they agree

Our prisoners are free

To serenade Alagbon with their screams

 

If you’re stuck in Jail-Upon-Thames

And tired of bars, grills  and frames

And hail from Nigeria

Well, cue the hysteria

You’re being brought back with King James

 

5. Pastor Chris Okotie, another perennial presidential “perspirant”, says God has told him to contest again in 2015.

Old pop star, though Fresh politician

In throes of divine proposition

Has recently said

He will go ahead

Contest in the coming election

 

6. Adams “dashes” hawker N1m, OBJ gives notice of intention to leave the PDP, MINTy Nigeria and the APC continues to welcome EVERYONE from the PDP.

There once was a guv’nor in Edo

Who lived by a different credo

Splashed widows and hawkers

Turned us into gawkers

Is he making an “eminado”?

 

Our leaders, their eyes are a-glint

While activists say they are skint

These ignorant few

Have not seen the view

Of Nigeria in the MINT!

 

Ex prez of the Khaki and Lace

In grand political volte face

Is leaving the coven

Will said crimes be proven

For now, we must all watch this space

 

It can’t be a happy prognosis

This grand political osmosis

For when you embrace

The gunk from that place

You’re bound to contract a necrosis

 

The state legislator named Lloyd

By macey-head escapade buoyed

Has been apprehended

For innards distended

As fleeing with ‘Maechi he toyed

(Read the Lloyd story here).

 

And the piece de resistance…

There was a Frenchman named Francois

Who broke Le Gold Rule du Boudoir

He stuck his baguette

In une autre palette

His Mrs took ill, ooh la la!

 

And a Few Others…

In 0-13s month of December

A husband got sliced on his member

But,peculiar life

He’s back with his wife

Uhm, wake me up, end of September.

A thought for the reds of Manchester

Because them again we must pester

4th home loss in 6

Can Moyesy still fix

Or does Alex need a de-rester?